After working a couple of years on my personal growth and inner transformation and moving to Ibiza in 2019, when talking to men, I often felt a feeling of superficiality, disconnection, of something lost, of not being present, and sometimes a deep feeling of discomfort, a lack of bonding, of men not truly being who they are, … So, I started experimenting with men’s gatherings, organising regular circles with friends, at my home or at friends’ places and led to the creation of Unconditional Men. Now, more than ever, we start seeing the need for men to connect to their inner core and a brotherhood, to belong and share their experiences, and feelings and be(come) vulnerable with each other.
Meanwhile, I learned that men's work encourages men to take on a different kind of leadership role - from the heart - and become proactive in creating positive change at home, at work, and in their communities. By doing so, men can become better role models for other men and inspire them to do the same. This can create a ripple effect, leading to a new generation of men who are more authentic and compassionate leaders. Men's work can pave the way for a new generation of leaders who are better equipped to tackle the challenges of the 21st century.
And it’s high time… reading just a a couple of articles this week on the challenges of masculinity today.
It’s raining articles these days about the polarities and imbalance of masculine and feminine energies within in our leadership, workplace and society at large.
“Men are in trouble. Around the world, boys are rapidly falling behind girls in education, and are increasingly feeling adrift in society. Men are committing suicide at significantly higher rates than women and living increasingly isolated lives in many developed nations. Our cultural story around masculinity is fraught and confused, and the struggles faced by men and boys have become fuel for a ruthless culture war. “
Brilliant piece and observation from Alexander Beiner in his newsletter about the fragile state of masculinity amongst many men these days in an increasingly polarised and complex society.
Read The Tragic Disconnect Between Men and Women by Avivah Wittenberg-Cox in Forbes where she’s exploring the connection between demographics, negative masculinity and epidemic levels of loneliness amongst men, and concludes “There will be no peace, progress or procreation without a healthy, mutually satisfying gender balance – at home, at work and in politics.”
And what about What’s the Matter with Men? by Idrees Kahloon in The New Yorker, writing about the complexity and perennial struggle among multiple masculinities: “Masculinity is fragile; it’s also malleable. The shapes it will assume in the future have consequences.”
Why won’t men stop bullying me? A great example of what’s currently happening in many workplaces today - and whether we allow it silently or not.
Mark Grayson from The Good Men Project mentioning research about how little change there has been in the masculine identities and behaviours that young men assume during adolescence and early adulthood since the 1950s (!) and taking personal responsibility on the issue: “The evidence is mounting that our failure to deal with our dominance-based culture of masculinity is not just causing harm to women but is contributing to a decline in our own physical and mental health and a plethora of societal and environmental conflicts.” Wise and experienced, he proposes some Blueprints for Men to bring that radical change the world needs so urgently.
Many of the archetypes advanced in modern masculine healing methods are derived from the patriarchal structures, while we are actually trying to evolve away from that. As a result, many men’s retreats and websites still working with these images tend to reify and reintegrate outdated models of masculinity that we need to update and expand.
Hence, we created Unconditional Men, exploring our capacity to integrate our feminine and masculine energies within us, harmonise genders among us, and to co-create systems of peace as whole human leadership.
If you feel the calling to join our cause, please join our Unconditional Men Circles WhatsApp group (men only).
Unconditional Men Journeys
The Unconditional Men Journeys are holistic online leadership courses, specially designed for formal and informal leaders, (social) entrepreneurs and change-makers to bring regenerative and impactful change to their organisations, and the communities and interpersonal relations around them, in a new and foundational way.
If you are a (potential) leader with a growth mindset, an open heart and a hunger for completeness and innovation embracing personal growth, these courses are the perfect fit for your personal and professional growth.
We are starting a new series of Online Journeys with Sudhir on February 22 on the topics of Deeper Purpose, Courage, Breaking Habits, True Power and Integrity.
As leaders, fathers, life partners, friends and brothers, our Unconditional Men Journeys will give you the possibility to evolve by fully acknowledging your creativity, courage, ingenuity, vulnerability, and love for life in sync with nature.
All our courses include activities and rituals to experience and learn methods & tools that will help you to do your inner work, wherever you are in your life.
Deeper Purpose - Living your Longing
Courage - Stepping out of Fear
Breaking Habits - Creating Rituals for Change
True Power - Owning your Shadows
Integrity - The Balanced and Integrated Masculine
Each Journey can be followed as a participant separately or as a complete cycle of five journeys.
Unconditional Men Facilitator Training
Many of the men who joined our Journeys in Ibiza last year are currently holding space in their own men's groups and communities, something we can only celebrate 🙌🏼
A new series of Facilitator Trainings are starting on February 22 as well.
I love your questions, comments and inquiries; use the comments below or connect to me directly.
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With love and joy,