Why men's work is important to create new leadership culture
There has been a lot of talks and discussions on the use of the word ‘toxic’ in the media, in relation to masculinity or femininity, as well in our local WhatsApp group in Ibiza. In the end, we all agree to not longer stigmatise what’s ‘broken’ or ‘wounded’ with the masculine (and feminine) and look at different ways to approach the polarities and imbalances of masculine and feminine energies within our leadership, workplace and society at large.
Humanity is currently experiencing a huge consciousness shift where our habits, attitudes, belief systems and assumptions of the past no longer seem to make sense while new forms of thinking and being are being developed to prepare for a different type of world, based on closer connections to, and with inspiration from, nature, as our current economic and industrial system is not any longer sustainable for our and future generations.
Men’s work may become a substantial key in the leadership transformation of the future.
When HBR starts writing about Men’s Mental Health at Work we better start paying attention. For too long, traditional ideas of masculinity have focused on power, competitiveness, and aggression. This has led to a culture where men are often afraid to show vulnerability and emotion, and where they are discouraged from seeking help or support. This outdated notion of masculinity is harmful not only to men, but to business and society as a whole.
The traditional male stereotype in several cultures includes ideas that men are expected to be assertive, ambitious, independent, self-reliant, in control, strong, and successful earners who have stable jobs and high-income security. These socialised ideals of masculinity motivate men to strive and live up to societal expectations to be strong (vs. weak), self-sufficient (vs. needing help), action-oriented (vs. emotional) and in control of their life (vs. lacking influence on their own life). This can reduce their capacity to acknowledge and recognise their own sadness and articulate those feelings to themselves. As a result, taking the time to think deeply about their feelings often causes anxiety in men, as it makes them realise that their current state doesn’t match their own, or larger society’s, definition of masculinity. In fact, doing so may lead to feelings of shame and embarrassment.
Men's work challenges these traditional ideas and is an important aspect of creating a new leadership culture because it encourages men to step up and take on leadership roles in their personal and professional lives. This work is crucial because it challenges the traditional notions of masculinity and encourages men to be more emotionally intelligent, inclusive, compassionate and authentic leaders.
A third (33%) of men aged 16-34 admit that feelings of embarrassment could prevent them from seeking help with their mental health.
By engaging in activities like self-reflection, emotional expression, and vulnerability, men can learn to better understand and manage their emotions. This, in turn, allows them to be more authentic and effective leaders.
Read Charles Eisenstein’s beautiful essay on men’s work visiting a Sacred Sons men’s gathering.
“What I witnessed confirmed my hope for the future of earth. I thought, “Without the kind of healing I am seeing here, this world has no chance. The world can heal only if men heal. And it is happening. We are ready.”
I invite you all to listen to Dr. Gabor Maté on The Man Enough Podcast podcast on our misconceptions about the traumas and “toxicity” within us. He talks about internalised rage, our ‘toxic’ world culture, childhood trauma and reframing our approach to mental illness.
“Men aren’t toxic, they’re traumatised.”
“To be man enough means to be a human being in connection with his authentic self in the present moment” - Dr. Gabor Maté
Furthermore, men's work encourages men to take on leadership roles and to be proactive in creating positive change in their communities. By stepping up and taking on leadership roles, men can become role models for other men and inspire them to do the same. This can create a ripple effect, leading to a new generation of men who are more authentic and compassionate leaders. Men's work can pave the way for a new generation of leaders who are better equipped to tackle the challenges of the 21st century.
Unconditional Men Journeys
On March 22, we're starting a new online journey on Courage: Stepping out of Fear.
Sometimes life shakes us up and turns the routines of our well-rehearsed life upside down. It takes a lot of courage to take a risk and make life-changing decisions without knowing exactly where our path will take us. It takes courage to lead our lives and others with integrity and from a position of vulnerability.
We need to be aligned and centred to stand our ground, in this urgent matter of co-creating a new world of collaboration, regeneration and inclusivity.
Join us for an in-depth and integrated learning experience:
Duration: 3 weeks
Dates: Wednesdays between 22.03.2023 - 05.04.2023
Session time: 19:30 to 21:30 CET
Note: you can join our Unconditional Men Journeys at any time during the year.
The Unconditional Men Journeys are holistic online leadership courses, specially designed for formal and informal leaders, (social) entrepreneurs and change-makers to bring regenerative and impactful change to their organisations, and the communities and interpersonal relations around them, in a new and foundational way.
All our courses include activities and rituals to experience and learn methods & tools that will help you to do your inner work, wherever you are in your life.
Deeper Purpose - Living your Longing
Courage - Stepping out of Fear
Breaking Habits - Creating Rituals for Change
Power - Owning your Shadows
Integrity - The Balanced and Integrated Masculine
Unconditional Men Facilitator Trainings
You can as well join our Unconditional Men Facilitator Trainings at any time during the year.
The UM Facilitator Training includes all 5 Journeys (Deeper Purpose, Courage, Breaking Habits, True Power and Integrity - 30hrs), 20hrs of online self-paced course material and exercises, facilitator traiing sessions (5hrs) and 15hrs of guides practice sessions during our online programs and circles. After completing the course, you will receive a Unconditional Men Facilitator Certificate.
“Every man, when he gets quiet, when he becomes desperately honest with himself, is capable of uttering profound truths. We all derive from the same source. There is no mystery about the origin of things. We are all part of creation, all kings, all poets, all musicians; we have only to open up, to discover what is already there.” ~ Henry Miller
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With love and joy,
PS: parts of this post were originally posted on RegenerateX newsletter.